An avoidant attachment style is defined as an insecure relationship pattern marked by a need for independence. Feelings of discomfort with emotional intimacy is exhibited as well as a tendency to pull away when closeness feels overwhelming. This style type can affect a relationship by far. If ones willingness to get close becomes too much to handle than a bond is impossible to build. Feelings of intimacy are not easily expressed. With this style, finding a life partner or even wanting one can be an impediment and only short term relationships and hookups are priortized. If your morals are unaffected, than this life style comes easy. The drawbacks to this style is getting diseases and transferring residue from past partners. Promiscuity damages the spirit and creates unwanted spiritual attachments.
Psychologists have stated that this style typically develops during early childhood when the primary caregivers are emotionally distant, unresponsive or critical when a child expresses their emotions. The child learns that depending on another doesn’t feel safe so they learn to suppress their emotions and rely safely on themselves. This style can also be developed later in life due to a series of trauma with bad relationships. This style might be inclined to the language of gift giving or acts of services.
Behavioral Signs:
- Maintaining emotional distance.
- Withdrawing after closeness.
- Fixation on independence.
- Conflict avoidance and stonewalling.
- Idealizing the past such as holding on to a phantom relationship.
- Body language disengagement (avoiding eye contact, give one word answers).
Mathew 11:28: “Come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.”
