A parent/child relationship is one of the most important relationship in our lives. From the time of birth to death, we have memories of moments shared with our parents. Some of them good and some not so good. It all depends on your circumstances.
For starters, do we pick our parents? Now that’s a very interesting question. I have watched stories on N.D.E aka Near Death Experiences and find them to be very fascinating. For what has been explained, listening to these experiences, believe it or not, we do. Now some of us can debate this and say, what? Really?! You must be kidding! I would have never have picked this woman for my mom nor this man for my dad. That’s absolutely insane! Then there are others that feel elated to have picked the parents they have. Whatever the case may be, whether you believe we do or not, is irrelevant. It’s the relationship we choose to cultivate with our parents that’s important. And yes it’s a choice. As a child, there is no choice because you’re under their care, rules and regulations. It’s when you become an adult, a choice is made. We either choose to accept the behavior we were subjected to or not. These are what we commonly believe to be the two choices and that’s it. Believe it or not, there is another choice. A third one, per say. That choice is we can learn from their behavior. Yes, learn. Everyone is different. No two people are alike. Conflicts are inevitable. It’s human nature. It’s how you deal with it that builds a relationship with your parents and your character. You can accept the good things that you love about them and pass that on to your own children and understand the things you didn’t like and turn it around and do better. The key is to be understanding.
-If they didn’t show love, it wasn’t shown to them.
-If they abused you, they were abused.
-If they didn’t care for you, they weren’t cared for.
-If they abandoned you, they were abandoned.
-If they hurt you, they were hurt.
Understanding what they went through, will allow you to honor, love and respect your parents. You’re probably thinking, I’m the child, they need to understand me. That’s true but sometimes life doesn’t always work that way. It’s as though you become the parent and they are the child. That means God picked you to teach them and hopefully you can.
My parents were polar opposites. My mom was loving and gentle. She was raised in a peaceful, loving home and loved her parents very much. She never knew what abuse was until she met my dad. He was raised in a dysfunctional home that created his abusive behavior and caused him to be a tyrant alcoholic. His mom was an alcoholic. Ger it! Children learn what they live.
As for the children that have awesome parents, kudos to you. God has blessed you immensely. Thank him and don’t ever take it for granted. Go on and be a blessing to your children and everyone else who can use it. Tomorrow is not promised. Everyday is a blessing. My mom use to say, as long as you’re living, you can change anything. It’s when you die, that nothing can be changed anymore.